You’re on candid camera.

“I could understand the unlikely impression of others about me, but not you! How could you misconceive my intentions!”

It was more or less the statement of Jen annoyed by some wicked thoughts of her beloved friend: me. We’ve been friends since grade school and we created a bond so lasting up to this point in time that we knew a lot of things about each other.

But some things may quite change as we grow up, like everybody else. Our train of thoughts, by life’s experiences, change and so the way we see the world and the people around us. I doubted our friendship and her intentions, and I threw the bomb to start the sweet and funny warfare between friends last Friday, January 22.

Oh please! This is not a love story. This is a test of genuine friendship.

My Train of Thought

I never want to be considered girl magnet, but I am. I cannot brag a curse, but being gay would not exclude me from ladies’ sexual attraction. My straight guys would almost envy me whenever we hit the night life and some women would entailed themselves approaching to KNOW me.

Some of my high school and college female friends have already confessed their attraction. Some have already past their feelings knowing my circumstances, while some yet have not.

Up to this point, I have unreasonable suspicion of the female human species and their motives whenever they befriend and inject some awkward appreciation toward me.

Jen was no exception. So I need clearance.

Totally Plants vs. Zombies

The atmosphere at the Secret Recipe restaurant in Midtown complemented what would be the fun fight. Set plates of chicken dish were served, alongside fries and green salads. We’ve talked so much about our supposed dinner with Fitness First buddies, Didith, Thez, and Jets, the last night–where she was missing.

“What have you talked about?” She asked.

“You.” I said. After all, it’s quite common in our culture to make the missing person in a gathering the subject of conversation.

I think she knew this was coming. So the litany of thoughts-made-words about her from our buddies was revealed.

I told her how Didith and Thez believed that she is obsessively in love with me. “Look, she even enrolled at Fitness First just to be with you,” someone have said that. “And it looks like she means it whenever she calls you her ‘boyfriend’,” another one justified. I even strengthened their belief by saying, “In Facebook, she loves posting comments consistently on my shoutouts and walls!”

Yes, I spilled everything. Not to mean hurting her, but I guess I was just honest on my doubts about our friendship.  I needed to tell her. And the last thing I wanted were huge onion rings thrown from her end–an answer. Or destructive feedback may be quite good enough.

We have the talents to make our arguments and conflicts dealt with fun and laughter, but I saw it: she was really annoyed.

“How could you misconceive my intentions!” She sweetly brawled with a laugh. She told me that Friendship is the only edge. She perfectly knew my sexual standing and friendship is the only thing she expects. She feels stress-free, blissful, and so much real and protected because she knew I’m the kind of guy who will not think of hitting, just as she expects from other guys she meet.

I should be ashamed, but I felt rather relieved.

I apologized and guaranteed her that I and the rest of the suspicious fitness buddies would never think of her that way again. It may be a huge job for me to clean the mess, but it’s my fault. So I’m ready to start scrubbing.

The Night at the Feast

It was time to go to the Feast Manila. We have fun going there–still talking about the dinner. Jen and I actively listened to the preaching. Coincidentally, Bro. O focused on releasing past guilts. It’s time for me to do so. At the Guilt Board (a big board where one should write any guilty wrong feeling to signify its release to his or her emotional system), I could only think of one. I wrote “DOUBT.”